The Issue That Wasn’t

Liam has found his mojo, his thing, his niche. ¬†After years of being a homebody and a bookworm, Liam joined the Cross Country team at his school and has really excelled at running. Though the season has ended, he has his sights set on breaking the school record next year. I’m so stinking proud of him.


After the first meet I asked Liam if he wanted to host a team dinner at our house. It’s a really nice group of kids and these are friendships I’d love to encourage. To my surprise, Liam said yes. I gave him two menu choices that he took to the team. He helped me clean and bake. They were all really looking forward to it.

Garreth and I sat Liam down a few nights before the dinner and brought up a subject I don’t think he’d considered: Aidan. Aidan is part of our family and would obviously be home for dinner. Some of Liam’s teammates may have seen Aidan around school/town/games before. I wanted Liam to be prepared if his friends had questions about Aidan or made any comments. I wasn’t at all expecting rude comments, but perhaps curious ones. Liam said he was prepared. I asked him if he had any concerns or preferences about Aidan’s presence. Liam requested that Aidan eat in the kitchen where we would set up a buffet while the team would eat in the living room. This was Liam’s night. Aidan’s feeding chair takes up a lot of room and he’s a messy eater. I had no problem granting this request.

The night of the dinner arrived and Aidan was in his manual wheelchair. The kids said hi to him and Liam told them his brother’s name. It was all very….normal. Aidan was absorbed into the fun of the evening. He wheeled around and was quite verbal trying to get in on conversations. The runners mostly ignored him, but not at all in a weird way. Aidan just wasn’t an issue at all. He was just….there… he should be on his brother’s big night.

I want to say something profound about inclusion, but mostly I find myself grateful to these kids for letting me celebrate who Liam is becoming and allowing Aidan to really be just part of the family.


On a side note, because the team (girls) were talking so much about the homecoming dance that weekend, Liam ended up going. His first dance ever. I only freaked out a little and I only texted him once.



We went on vacation last week and it was wonderful. There were so many places for Aidan to drive around. He was pretty convinced that everyone else was taking vacation at the same time just to see him.

I love watching him drive. This happened to be in the snake house of the zoo (ok there was just one little snake) so he had to go in by himself. ¬†There was no way I was going in there, and wouldn’t you know, it was his favorite place.

(this is a video so subscribers will have to click through to blog to view)

Because Aidan was took the week off of school, we made sure he got in plenty of sensory exercises with sand and water.


But, gosh that can be hard work.

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We had a great time playing cards, reading books, eating vacation food, and hanging around.

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Garreth and I are in a new phase where we could actually leave the boys together so we walked on the beach just the two of us every night. I feel like I’ve arrived.

Big shout out thank-you to Uncle Al and Auntie Merry for lending us their seaside vacation home. Just the respite we needed.

In other news, Liam is away on a farm adventure this week. He decided to give me a tattoo to help with the separation.

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Yes, it does in fact say “I love my children on tuesdays.” I miss that witty boy.

Take A Load Off

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No, really, Aidan, take a load off…

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Aidan spent FIVE HOURS in the pool yesterday, mostly snoring, not snorkeling, but snoring. We took good care of him…

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Which was clearly a sacrifice…..


After all of that hard work, there’s not much energy for anything else….